Archive for the ‘Best Duck in the World’ Category

Chimichurri and the Meaning of Life

Saturday, November 24th, 2018

BingoBoingo: re: http://btcbase.org/log/2018-11-15#1872387 How is Chimichurri Raptorson doing these days?

There is a time in the flow of duckitude ripe with thought and reflection, ever eager for an answer to that nagging void: when shall the next trocito of premium yellowtail materialize?

cml1

Yes, his is a philosophical adolescence, a blooming of quill-topped q-tips o'er the wings, a chortling curiosity towards twins.

cml2

The great horizons call, full of wonderment and hermit crabs. A duck cannot but wonder: why is he here?

cml3

Who invented the lambada?

cml4

If a feather grows in the forest and there's no one around to scratch it, does it make an itch?

cml5

No matter the conundrum, the conclusion tends the same. A sunny disposition's the thing, whether doing laps in the sea or in wild bewilderment.

The (appropriately-proportioned) Ballad of Chimichurri

Wednesday, September 19th, 2018

O mottled beak and pink, webbed feet
that wobble with my boots,
No earthly dangers could defeat
the fierceness of his poops.

chimi1

And though his down be tinged with gold
don't brand him yellow-belly.
This duckling's jumped an inch, all told
to get into the jelly.

chimi5

A mountain-duck by birth, he deigned
to live amongst the valley
and eat entireties of worms, and
all crumbs he can rally.

chimi2

And I ken it's through these very feats
that Thursday's 56g
when added to his tonne of treats
is Monday's 71.3

chimi4

His awesome mass is multiplied
by awesome wealth; it's testified
he vanquished all the pond's paltroons
and sleeps now 'top his won dubloons.

chimi3

Yea, the price of valor's a lofty nap,
quack quack quack quack quack quack quack.

***

Also, aside from inspiring Vogon poetry, baby ducks also make excellent pets for people attempting to adjust their daily schedules earlier.